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Written Review – Evil Baby Orphanage

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What if we jumped into a time machine and rounded up the most evil of evil-doers and outlaws before they could wreak havoc on the world? What if instead of assassinating these figures we gave them to Time-Nannies to watch over them and keep them out of trouble? That is exactly what you do in the historically based rehabilitation card game from Wyrd Miniatures called Evil Baby Orphanage, and the kicker is that it’s a lot of fun.

What’s It All About?

In Evil Baby Orphanage you play as a Time-Nanny who adopts evil babies and places them in your orphanage. You and your fellow Time-Nannies will scramble about adopting babies and looking after them for the sake of the world. You attempt to keep the little buggers out of trouble, and occasionally encourage them to be mischievous when it suits your needs. The object is to be the first nanny to obtain 8 Mischief Points. Don’t dismiss the babies too soon though, because they have more ways than you can count to ruin even the most seasoned Nannies’ day.

Out of the Box and Setup

Evil Baby Orphanage comes in a quality sturdy box to keep your game in. Inside the box are two different decks of cards. The cards are fairly standard in quality and the art is fun and lively. You have a Nanny Deck that has a green back and a Baby Deck with a purple back. Each deck gets placed face down in the center of the table. Each player takes four cards from the top of the Nanny deck and then a player deals out three cards face up from the Baby Deck. This row of face up cards creates the Time Stream from which Nannies adopt their orphans. After the Time Stream has been established each player draws one baby from the Baby Deck and places it face up in front of them. This card creates the beginning of each player’s orphanage. Now that you’re all set up, the Evil Baby mayhem is about to begin!


The main objective of each of the players is to be the first to collect 8 Mischief Points. The points are marked on the corner of your adopted babies and you add those up to accumulate your score. Sounds simple, doesn’t it? It may, but I can assure you that chasing after the most evil babies in history is not a leisurely task. Players take turns, and each turn is broken down into five steps or phases as follows:

• Step 1: Win – You can only win if you have 8 points at the start of your turn

• Step 2: Activity – At this time you can play Nanny Cards from your hand or discard toys that you have laid down in your orphanage. These have various actions but are very important to keeping the babies in line.

• Step 3: Supervise – This is when the real insanity can begin. You can now supervise your babies going from left to right. The babies have icons on the bottom of the card or a written action that they can take. They have provided a handy ID card for the icons so each player has one of those for reference. It is at this time that you can play various cards such as good toys like the “Ninja Gandhi Action Figure” to prevent your little ones from taking actions. It is in this step that the deep strategy and thinking takes place. Sometimes it may be in your best interest to allow one or more of your bundles of joy to take their actions and as a result you could end up with the upper hand.

• Step 4: Adopt – During this step you can adopt a baby from the time stream and add them to your orphanage. • Step 5: Draw – In this step you draw to refill your hand back up to four cards. Play then continues on to the next player and so on. If at any time a player has 8 points at the beginning of their turn than they are winner and have saved humanity from the clutches of their Evil Babies.

The Verdict

Evil Baby Orphanage is a fun and energetic game that can inspire laughs and good natured competition among the players. The game is for 3+ players and is perfect for a gathering or party atmosphere. The mechanics and rules on this game are simple enough that even the most novice gamers would find this game easy to learn and understand. With time anyone can master this game but don’t always count on your best thought out strategy to bring you the victory – this game can change things on-the-fly. The fun abilities that some of the cards have set up the atmosphere to be one of many laughs and groans. No matter how this game ends it is one that is sure to bring fun to any table! My only warning for this game is that the content may not be suitable to anyone without a good sense of humor, so beware. Aside from that, I had tons of fun with my evil babies!